I believe most of us would like to live a peaceful life, one with minimal stress with a sense of well being and joy permeating our being. Along life’s path I doubt that you received the manual as to how to gain this way of life. You, like most of us, have picked up bits of wisdom here and there and have tried to incorporate them into our lives. A gentle man of peace, Dalai Lama, has offered his perspective has presented by the blog Expanded Consciousness. I present them to you with my added commentary.

“Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.” I know from personal experience that it was scary for me to let down my “desperado defenses” to marry Sherry, the love of my life. Also, it was scary leaving my Dean position at Kennesaw State University to start a private practice from scratch while having two small children. As Kierkegaard proclaimed, “a leap of faith” is called for to get the great achievements.

“When you lose, don’t lose the lesson”. Too often people keep doing the same failing things over and over because they have not learned the “lesson”. I see this in my practice over and over, especially in the area of relationships. As Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

“Follow the three R’s: Respect for self. Respect for others. Responsibility for all your actions.” I believe respect and trust are the cornerstones, along with love, for a life worth living.

“Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.”

“Learn the rules so that you know how to break them properly.”

“Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship.” The ability to forgive, let go, and re-connect, if the relationship is worth it, is an important task. Stubbornness and a false pride can keep you stuck.

“When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.” Too often people try to hide their mistakes, or lie about them.

“Spend time alone each day.” This is a gem. Too few people do this. I relish my alone time, whether it be sitting quietly, riding a bike, or on the water in my boat. These times serve as a time of de-stressing, reflecting, gaining renewed energy.

“Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.” To remain a person of integrity and be open to a better way to move forward can be challenging, but most satisfying ultimately.

“Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.” This one has often been a challenge for me. I continually try to remember that everything I think and feel does not need to come out of my mouth!

“Live a good honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.”

“A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.” If I have learned anything over the years of my practice it is how great your home life affects every aspect of your life forever.

“In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.” This may be the biggest roadblock I have in counseling with couples. They, more so the ladies, keep bringing up the past and refuse to let go. Thus, moving forward is difficult.

“Share your knowledge, it is a way to achieve immortality.” Wisdom is meant to be shared for a positive evolutionary thrust into the future.

“Be gentle with the earth.”

“Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.” What a neat idea! Continuing to experience new people and places certainly adds to more knowledge and “expanded consciousness”.

“Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.” Needy relationships do not grow, do not last. They are built on weakness, co-dependence, as opposed to synergistic interdependence. Love is expansive in it very nature.

“Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.” Have not thought of that before but find it true in my life. Profound.

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.” Compassion and empathy are soulful connections of respect and caring. Worthy gifts to be shared.

“If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” The Dalai Lama either wanted to emphasize “compassion” or he wanted to end with 20 and couldn’t think of anything else!

Well, Respected Reader, how well do you do with these lessons? Which ones particularly do you want to work on? I’ve got a couple that need some attention. Glad I wrote this for I have “expanded my consciousness” in order to live a more “peaceful life”!

Dr. Stathas can be reached at 706-473-1780. Email: Stathas@plantationcable.net. Web site: drstathas.googlepages.com. Blog: drstathas.com

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